Man’s confidence in dating women

Why Women Want Confident Men

As a Dating coach and Phoenix Matchmaker, I’ve talked to hundreds of women about man’s confidence in dating women. The one trait that always comes up is confidence. Many men ask, “What about being nice?” Yes, women like nice guys. But being the nice guy is often code for being shy, submissive, and a pushover. These are the last traits women want in a man.

Nothing is more attractive than a man who knows who he is and what he wants. Women want to feel safe and cared for. They want a partner who they can depend on.

The bottom line is this: women want confident men.

Before diving into the reasons why, let’s look at what confidence is and what it isn’t. There are many misconceptions surrounding the definition of confidence.

What Confidence Is Not

Confidence is not arrogance, bravado, or a large ego. Think of the Wannabe Pickup Artist. These men study all types of manipulative tactics and techniques to “neg” women. But this behavior only serves to cover up insecurity. Women don’t want a man who’s putting on a show of false bravado. They’re looking for the real deal.

What Confidence Is

True confidence is self-assurance. Confident men don’t feel a need to try too hard. They aren’t out to prove anything – to themselves or anyone else. They are secure in who they are, exuding an attitude of “I can handle this.”

The more confidence you have, the better relationships you will have. Psychologist Barbara Markway, Ph.D. explains that confidence equals less focus on yourself. “We’ve all been guilty of walking into a room and thinking, ‘They’re all looking at me. They all think that every word I say is stupid.’ When you get out of your own head, you’ll be able to engage with others,” she says.

Why is this attitude of confidence so important to women? Here are four top reasons why women want confident men: